[11:42, 05/07/2022 – Lara von Leiden has entered the room]
[11:42, 05/07/2022 – Severin has entered the room]
[11:43, 05/07/2022] Lara von Leiden: So understood? Don’t come back here otherwise.
[11:43, 05/07/2022] Severin: I follow your lines and wants.
[11:44, 05/07/2022] Lara von Leiden: Clear
[11:45, 05/07/2022 – Silk has entered the room]
[11:46, 05/07/2022] Silk: The overprotective type wants to protect you from harm, pain, unhappiness, bad experiences and rejection, hurt feelings, failure and disappointments.
[11:46, 05/07/2022 – Andy W. has entered the room]
[11:46, 05/07/2022] Severin: You? Here?
[11:47, 05/07/2022] Andy W.: I got tattooed yesterday.
[11:47, 05/07/2022] Andy W.: J. did it. It was very sensual.
[11:47, 05/07/2022] Severin: What did he tattoo you?
[11:48, 05/07/2022] Lara von Leiden: You’ve seen the last Cronenberg or what?
[11:48, 05/07/2022] Andy W.: Yes, they were having so much pleasure being cut open by these machines. I didn’t close my eyes or ears once. They were not in pain. Surgery is the new sex they say so I asked J. to come over to do it. I never know what to do with sex so I wanted to try how it feels to melt blood with ink. I liked the colors and the feeling. I seem dum sometimes, but who cares.
[11:51, 05/07/2022] Severin: I do care!!!
[11:51, 05/07/2022 – Armie H. has entered the room]
[11:52, 05/07/2022] Lara von Leiden: We know you do, Severin. You always do.
[11:52, 05/07/2022] Armie H.: I would love to lick that blood.
[11:53, 205/07/2022] Silk: Here we go again. The creepy shark smelling blood.
[11:53, 05/07/2022] Andy W.: I love sharks. Welcome Dear Sexy Shark. I am sorry but the blood has already dried into scars.
[11:54, 05/07/2022] Lara von Leiden: Andyyyy! Stop.
[11:54, 05/07/2022] Armie H.: Could I get the scab? Or even cut a piece of skin? I could always keep it in my pocket to have a little piece of you.
[11:55, 05/07/2022] Andy W.: J. shouted at me the other night saying: You are using me, you are using me, you are using me! And I never know what to say. My silences drive him crazy but I don’t hide anything. I was just filming lovers as corpses.
[11:56, 05/07/2022] Armie H.: Corpses as lovers.
[11:56, 05/07/2022] Lara von Leiden: Are you kidding me?
[11:57, 05/07/2022] Severin: Let them interact.
[11:57, 05/05/2022] Lara von Leiden: ??
[11:58, 05/07/2022] Severin: Sorry
[11:58, 05/07/2022 – Severin has reported Armie H.]
[11:58, 05/07/2022 – Armie H. has been removed]
[11:59, 05/05/2022] Lara von Leiden: Good boy.
[12:00, 05/07/2022] Andy W.: He is so handsome. What a pity. Singular sense of ownership though. Anyhow, people always want to know what they don’t know but keep it quiet. Keep it secret. Retain. And, at the same time, you just need to be the mirror of what they like, what they are drowned to – in front of their face – just in front of their face. A feeling of comfort. So they don’t feel alone.
[12:02, 05/07/2022] Andy W.: You’re liking what you like, you’re liking to like what you like – a desire to desire – what you desire the most. And you want this desire to be acknowledged. That’s all. Look at what you like, look at people look at what you like. Then you are not ashamed of it.
[12:04, 05/07/2022]Andy W.: They like to be liked. They like – they like to be like everyone. They like to see what they like, liking things others like. And then you can bring discomfort.
They all want to be like everyone, but then they want to be special but not really.
[12:05, 05/07/2022] Silk: As a result, their inability to verbalize their wants or needs, combined with their struggle to navigate their environment successfully, can be a recipe for a temper tantrum. If they have a low tolerance for frustration, they may hit themselves as a way of expressing their exasperation.
[12:06, 05/07/2022] Andy W.: So they need to be told.
[12:06, 05/07/2022] Andy W.: Who has a story to tell? Anyone?
[12:07, 05/07/2022] Severin: Well, I'm in Tokyo right now, in a cinema.
[12:07, 05/07/2022] Lara von Leiden: As I told him to. Please describe now.
[12:07, 05/07/2022] Severin: The lobby is covered in dirty faded red velvet everywhere. Many people are waiting, sitting on the floor, for the film to start. People are sweating, and it looks like they are waiting for a constantly delayed flight.
[12:08, 05/07/2022] Silk: Letting them wait or cry for a few minutes or longer may be helpful. Then they can learn how to self-soothe themselves and deal with ‘lack’.
[12:09, 05/07/2022] Severin: Now two very sexy people in leather jackets enter the room, apparently the director and her actress.
[12:10, 05/07/2022] Severin: Wait, we have to stand up now. We have to follow them into the dark room like zombie followers.
[12:11, 05/07/2022] Lara von Leiden: Are you already in?
[12:13, 05/07/2022] Severin: We now sit down, the film begins.
[12:15, 05/07/2022] Severin: Two (very short) employees are constantly scanning the room with maglites to make sure no one is masturbating.
[12:15, 05/07/2022] Lara von Leiden: You must love it.
[12:15, 05/07/2022] Andy W.: Service performed with pride and dedication, I am sure.
[12:16, 05/07/2022] Andy W.: Give, give, give and retain. Give and retain. Retain, retain and give.
[12:16, 05/07/2022 – Wanda has entered the room]
[12:16, 05/07/2022] Wanda: We do not want them to have pleasure and we literally disavow their own identity as a necessity. They are discarded and exchanged theatrical props, if not a decor.
[12:17, 05/07/2022] Lara von Leiden: We like to be physically touched by them. We feel ourselves more connected to the world when a presence confirms our own. We are obsessed by their commitment and dedication. It confirms our own presence. We are obsessed with being confirmed.
[12:18, 05/07/2022] Wanda: More than possessing them, we are into them being at our mercy.
[12:18, 05/07/2022 – Wanda has left the room]
[12:18, 05/07/2022] Severin: So she left already?
[12:18, 05/07/2022] Lara von Leiden: As you can see.
[12:19, 05/07/2022] Severin: I have to adapt. I have to adapt to be an appropriate subject. I am disposable and open.
[12:19, 05/07/2022] Lara von Leiden: Who told you that?
[12:19, 05/07/2022] Silk: His psychologist.
[12:20, 05/07/2022] Severin: But then I become soft, and then I become tender and then I need to hurt myself to feel my edges. And I have no time to chew so I eat it mashed, pre-mashed, pre-chewed, and pre-done. And all is practical and convenient and I don’t want that but still, I agree. I do agree. I do give my consent. And they ask for my consent and I give it most of the time right?
[12:22, 05/07/2022] Lara von Leiden: Calm down. Go to the bathroom.
[12:22, 05/05/2022] Severin: The comic side of my situation is that I can escape but do not want to; I am ready to endure anything as soon as she threatens to set me free
[12:23, 05/07/2022 – Lacan has entered the room]
[12:24, 05/07/2022] Lacan: I hate psychologist! Do not adapt. Resist. You need to use—you need to make the patient or the client or the analysand use his own story to whip themselves. Then they understand that the BAD side of the situation has been created by their tongue. Because when you really really really really really find someone that is so bad for you, you don’t want them in your life anymore — just leave them aside— or you just kill them inside you. When you want to let them stay in your environment — stay in your life, it doesn't mean he is evil, it means yooou neeeed this part of evil in your life. “Ne te méprends pas là-dessus.” And it’s exactly the same for society, it’s exactly the same for a country, a city, a continent. Whip, whip whip whip whip whip! The Sadist won’t come till the Masochist does. Don’t make it the opposite way. Don’t make it the opposite way.
[12:26, 05/07/2022 – Lacan has left the room]
[12:26, 05/07/2022] Andy W.: Obscene scripted as a mysterious collapsed reunion.
[12:45, 05/07/2022] Severin: What should I do in the bathroom?
[12:27, 05/07/2022 – Lacan has entered the room]
[12:28, 05/07/2022] Lacan: That’s why I prefer people to suffer — you know at least they have a bone in their mouth, even if they hurt their teeth — they have a bone in their mouth. Don’t let them forget that they have to suffer, or they are just going to be damned! They will just be like a worm! ‘Un ver’— just like that — with no teeth to suffer. Un ‘ver’ or a ‘verre’ — a glass — meaning only a recipient, or a receiver. But you need to go ‘vers’, meaning towards. Otherwise you’re a bored and boring receiver. No feast — directly to go in your head, everything is going to be soft, everyone is going to be happy softer, everyone is going back to a worm. Be careful of your bones (buddy). Be careful of your bones, or in one hundred years they’re going to disappear, you’d better fight a bit. Only the ones who suffer will have proper bones and teeth — you think that nature is going to overwhelm you — or you think that nature is going to be really dangerous for you — and there will be lots of movement and changes to the earth but be careful of your own bones buddy. And feel thankful that really hard water comes on your flesh — it means yeah, you have to react. You have to react in real, in material. Be careful of that, yeah be careful of that, be careful of that. We don't mind being plumbers till we have a pipe to touch.
[12:38, 05/07/2022 – Lacan has left the room]
[12:38, 05/07/2022] Andy W.: Right-now ultra-responsive beings will become more and more responsive to everything. So this extra sensitivity-responsivity is going to grow, and grow and grow – dividing the self as a kind of special unit, that is already becoming units – but overstimulation ends in numbness.
[12:40, 05/07/2022] Lara von Leiden: Shaking non-responsive matter is my duty.
[12:42, 05/07/2022 – Andy W. has shared lyrics from Cher, ‘Believe’]
♫ Do you believe in life after love?
I can feel something inside me say
I really don't think you're strong enough, no
Do you believe in life after love?
I can feel something inside me say
I really don't think you're strong enough, no ♫
[12:45, 05/07/2022 – Andy W. has left the room]
[12:45, 05/07/2022 – Silk has left the room]
[12:45, 05/07/2022] Severin: Hello???
[23:01, 05/07/2022 – Lara von Leiden has sent a picture]
[23:04, 05/07/2022] Severin: I want to touch it.
[23:23, 05/07/2022] Lara von Leiden: Keep it in mind. You won’t have access to it for a while.

*The ‘Lacan’ parts are excerpts from a psychic medium session between Brendan Michal Heshka and Margaux Schwarz (as part of The Dead are Always High project) that took place in February 2017 in Brussels, BE.